Nature changes nature
Cheat code to life
A friend once complained to me about how her friends don’t support her art [enough]. She does music and comedy and always shares her links for views. The complaint was incessant so I tried to pacify her but at a point, I chose to ask her, you know I write yeah? Have you ever clicked on my links to read my articles? You know I also make money per click on my articles? I’ve listened to your songs & even viewed your videos to boost them but you’ve never even deemed it right to read my piece. She became silent & grim. 🙂
I wasn’t trying to guilt-trip her, wasn’t even trying to make her invest in my works, but to let her put herself in the shoes of those she complains about and that was effective. She thought within herself about why she has never supported my works and she had to confess that it is “absentmindedness”, and not hate. Maybe it’s not just absentmindedness as she had thought, maybe it is the over-familiarity that breeds negligence and nonchalance to causes so dear to our loved ones at times. And of course, it could be envy. The perception that you’re doing or having a little less than your pal when at least, you both should be having an equal share of life even if you are not getting it better. Calm down, don’t feel ashamed of yourself or embittered to knits with such traits. It is natural. It is human. It is our legitimate flaw. And it is most common with people we reserve trust in, people we expect to support us without even flinching, those we are so entitled to their cheerleading that we don’t even think we should ask before they help us push our dear causes to a high. Our family. Our friends. Our colleagues. Our circle. They are humans and are not exempted from showing those awfully disappointing traits. Just like you. 😀
You are not alone in that position. They also are not alone in such a position. We’re in togedaaaaa-ah! 🎶 🕺💃
You know that song, right? 😀 J-Lo’s frenzy Brazil’14 World Cup theme song😉
However, knowing it is a general human trait is not only the core, as it leaving a painful feeling and unhelpful result. But seeking to abort the trait so that it doesn't keep causing damage to results & relationships we are tirelessly watering. Yeah, it can be aborted. It can be removed from your set of traits & even leave no trace like it never existed. You’re human, you own your traits. Your traits don’t own you. You’re responsible for your behaviors, if they’ll ever get better or get worse, you’re the one who’ll have to steer the wheel of change. You can change yourself. No such thing as a natural trait that can’t be modified if the person is willing. And that’s why it has to start with you!
Besides, you’re the one who gets directly affected when not supported, you’re the one the bitterness affects, yours is the work that is deprived & unhelped. So, why not be the one to take the bull by the horn instead of grumbling and tirelessly waiting for the other parties to just change and cast you their support? Why not drive the change yourself? In a very affable way! In a way so natural that it can’t be faulted😀 You see, nature dances to the tune of nature. Nature has the code to unlock another nature. If you want to see a moody person smile, you won’t have to come with a straight face. You will be wearing the most beautiful smile your face can don😊.
Nature changes nature. That’s the code. 🙂
You will have to start supporting the good works of your homies. Yeah😉. You must be known to be a good supporter of their adorable art. You must put up acts that get you considered a friend indeed by your homies. Not just “one of the friends”. Don’t be passive about their good works. Don’t pretend you don’t see them. Appraise them. Show support however little way you can. Do so sincerely, genuinely. It has a telling effect. As that proverb in the holy book says, one who wants a friend must FIRST show himself friendly😊. Sow supports and one thing you’re assured to reap, or at least, entitled to expect to reap, is supports.
Don’t be like that my girlfriend who never bothered to read my articles but always gets bothered and grumbling that our friends don’t play her songs. Truth is, she may have been treating our other friends’ works the way she’s been treating mine, yet she expects the best from friendship. That’s utterly an entitled mindset, gutter mentality😆 [Nah, that’s not to spite her😀😉]
In your consistent little way, support them. Buy their product, hire their service, play their sounds, read their writings, share their links, do whatever! And don’t forget to always leave a decent comment, especially when you’re satisfied with their work. It reaffirms to them your support.
I haven’t been able to do as much as I wish for my homies, but when I’m able to do these little things, I feel a tingle of joy! Like sharing my students'/proteges’ art pieces, advancing my siblings’ artworks, recommending my friends’ songs etc. It gives me the feeling that I’ve sown support to their efforts and it won’t be out overboard if one day I demand they support mine too. Don’t expect to reap where you don’t sow and let the least to be known is that you hate entitlement mentality.
The homies you’ve not so supported, always have in mind, and till you can do for them, don’t demand from them. At best, plead with them. Beg. And don’t do that often. It’s sweeter when you get after you’ve given😉
